Happy Birthday To YouHooHooHoo

I'm one year grumpier than last time we chatted.

When I woke up today and checked my email, I had 67 one-line cheerful bouncy Happy Birthday messages from forums where I don't even recall signing up (and four I'm pretty sure I don't belong to). Oh, and eighteen more heart-felt pleas for me to assist moving millions of dollars out of Nigeria from Dear Best Friends.

All I can say is thank goodness for email. If I'd received all this garbage in print form, I would have to contract for a new Dumpster and instead of grumping about spam, I would be bemoaning the loss of three good-sized trees.

Fixing The Internet, At Your Service

An acquaintance of mine IM'd me to warn me that she was pretty sure she'd broken the Internet.

I asked her why she would think such a thing.

Her web browser told her so.

I thanked her for letting me know... *** insert barely-suppressed giggle ***

Then she asked if I could fix it.

'The Internet?'

"yes! I broke it!!"

uhh

'I don't think you can actually break th-'

"one sec.. I'll quit the Internet so you can work on it."

uhhhh

'ok... just let me know...'

"ok. I quit it"

'all right. shut off your browser and count to five.'

"ok"

***/me drums fingers on desk in a repeated five stroke roll ***

"ok it's off. Now what?"

'turn it back on'

"ok"

***music on hold (see previous posts of mine)***

"ok, it's coming back on...
HEY IT WORKS! YOU FIXED IT!! THANKS!!!!!"

*** /me disconnecting to avoid having to figure out what to say in response ***

Apparently, some things are better left in the hands of experts and the Powers That Be who bestow the unsuspecting and non-technical with web browsers and operating systems that Are Not Mac.

Bless her heart.